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cwyckham · 03-05-2014, 12:31

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ann T. Cate

Eric, et al,

Just know we're wishing you and Charlotte speedy healing. We hope you come back here soon.

I rather suspect that for a while you'll be pretty hard on yourself, but as Boatie says, "it's finished." Do your grieving, and move on. Ignore the judgmental folks who probably don't even understand how their negative comments may affect you. Don't give them the ability to hurt you, but stay centered on your new life plans as they emerge.

S**t happens.....You wrote that you were living an adventure, and in a sense you were, but you were also just living life, and some decisions didn't work out as you hoped. This happens to all of us. Nobody promised us a rose garden, and I think that is one of the hardest lessons of all in life, to accept that, and keep on doing the best we can, making decisions that may or may not work out, we never know for sure. Manifesting your positive attitude towards life is going to help.

Chins up, guys.

Wishing you all the best,

Ann

Great post, Ann

letsgetsailing3 · 03-05-2014, 13:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ann T. Cate

^^^^^
Wanting Eric's account and demanding it on a public forum are different things. Why not be content to wait for Eric to return when he's ready?

No offense intended. For me, this is a question of one's own good judgment, and having space for people who are grieving to get on with it. When they come to acceptance, we may hear directly from them if they are not put off by us all here beforehand.

Ann

If people are going to blog about their life's experience, one might expect that they blog the good and the bad.

As for good judgment, this is a forum, and so a variety of opinions are what keeps it interesting. I don't mind if Eric takes his time to give his account, but Mark makes a good counterpoint.

IdoraKeeper · 03-05-2014, 13:41

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

oh! OK!! I'll take happiness!!!

CONTRIBUTE TO THE SALTYMONKEY KARRIBIAN BOAT RETIREMENT FUND!!

Hey Monkey! I will chip in. We will buy you the Flying Hawaiian and you can retire to the delta!

SaltyMonkey · 03-05-2014, 13:50

Oh YAY!

The end of a dream: homemade 'Flyin' Hawaiian' catamaran for sale on eBay - Marin Independent Journal

Flyin' Hawaiian sailboat builder jailed after fight with Loch Lomond harbor master - Marin Independent Journal

**Jim Cate** · 03-05-2014, 15:53

Now that someone else has raised the issue, what is the current status of the Flyin' H?

I followed it on SA for a while, but I just can't stand all the BS there and gave it up. However, I must admit to morbid curiosity about the outcome, so have any of you, braver or more tolerant than I, kept up with the saga? I'd love to hear a synopsis.

Cheers,

Jim

**weavis** · 03-05-2014, 16:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue Crab

Ditto! One of the folks on here has a signature line that reads something like "everyone has a right to their own opinion but not to their own facts."

ahem... unless someone else uses it. I did say that somewhere.......

(and I will want royalties)

cheoah · 03-05-2014, 19:12

Speaking of morbid curiosity, mine is pretty piqued. This guy railed on anyone that made a mistake at sea and called in for help, but I certainly do not begrudge the lack of empathy and compassion he showed to every perfect stranger who blew it at sea. That is no doubt a personality feature of the past, and I don't judge him for being less than perfect. Now that he knows it. I'm sure he is a great guy, and I was terribly disappointed to see this happen to them. I take no joy in others failures, but I'm also not going to mourn the loss of some fiberglass, wood, diapers and toys - sorry. All the important stuff - even the dream - is salvageable.

It is easy to get so caught up in a dream that you forget what it is for, and it does seem pretty straightfoward what happened. Baby sick, mama not happy, questionable prep and procedures, family never did much coastal cruising in various conditions, and just hoped it would be doable. Not sure that's it, I only recently discovered Rebel Heart's fate, and was very surprised, but not inspired to read pages and pages and multiple threads, I think.

It could happen to anyone, even someone who does their homework and is prepared otherwise, has 10,000 posts on CF, and it did. I expect Eric will come back and talk the whole thing through, and provide some learning for the collective body and the database. I prefer to learn from others mistakes, assume others do too. If there is stuff about fuel tankage and sanitation, or the fact that west coasters don't have a good inlet every 100 miles or so like we do -- resulting in less passagemaking experience as a family -- I want to hear about it and so do others. That's the draw of CF for me, and I expect we'll hear about it sometime. Seems like this happened a while ago, but I had back surgery and was figuring out how to walk right again, and I've lost track of time. But I do have shoes, feet, and legs

I'm sure this is a big adjsutment, but they are just fine. They were not playing a video game, it was for real, a place where every decision yields very real, life changing results. Safe and sound they are, though, with two healthy babies (I hope), and plenty of time to do whatever they want. Perhaps bailing out meant a saved baby ultimately, or the entire crew. Who knows what could have happened to a crew riding at least partly on luck. I know I am. I'm often not 100% prepared and shove off anyway, in the interest of time. Not so much with my babies, across the pacific. That's out of my league.

Congratulations Rebel Heart's crew. You sunk your first ship and everyone is just fine! I guarantee you in ten years it will feel much different.

I bet they get a catamaran this time

SaltyMonkey · 03-05-2014, 19:24

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheoah

I bet they get a catamaran this time

No, a PSC 34 Voyager.

Meow

cheoah · 03-05-2014, 19:38

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

No, a PSC 34 Voyager.

Meow

Hoping the catamaran comment might lure him back in. Time to get back on the horse, Eric....

cheoah · 03-05-2014, 19:53

Rebs, dude, come on. Lots of great sailors lose their boats. If you are going to spend a bunch of time sailing, you may just have to abandon ship.

What are you looking at on yachtworld?

I would believe it if he said none at all; I might be over it for a while too. Hey, now you do't have to deal with that effing fuel tank

This is the kind of stuff that makes a man, or woman. This is a pretty big smackdown, but you'll be WELL ahead of the pack when yo return to sea. There is no shortcut to really getting it right, and these kind of experiences have he ability to really propel us forward. Once we get over the "defeat"

I don't think he's listening.....

SaltyMonkey · 03-05-2014, 20:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by cheoah

I don't think he's listening.....

I wouldn't to the dribble from CF, from the masks that pretend "educational purposes", raising their putrid sunburned hands over their hearts, mugging feigned expressions of caring and ignorance.

If you haven't learned your lessons now, then you're lying.

To the wrabbit sniffers, quit stealing their broken dream; go get your own broken dream.

letsgetsailing3 · 04-05-2014, 17:10

To those who would censor the Rebel Heart threads by insulting other posters who don't agree with you, or to presume that they have bad motives, I say "Stop badgering the other posters on the forum."

This is a forum, right? A place where people discuss things and have various opinions about them?

Who made the first rule of Rebel Heart threads to be "You do NOT talk about Rebel Heart"?

This made sense when they were being rescued, but we should be past that by now. I'm sure a lot of people are interested in knowing what really went wrong, and what could be done to avoid similar types of mistakes. There are those here who insist that the only mistake made was blogging on the internet.

Not every question here is an attack on Eric. Just like every incident, we're curious about what really happened and why.

msponer · 05-05-2014, 01:39

Well, I feel bad for them. I think the timing just sucks. Many of my long passages had a part in them that sucked. Where it felt like a huge mistake to even be there, far out at sea. Sometimes that lasted for days. But we always found a rhythm and settled into a joyful and simple happiness. Even with the bad periods, every long passage has, on the whole, been wonderful.

I feel its awful that their first one ended before they seem to have found their groove. If this had happened later, they would at least know for sure if this is fun or not. It would be difficult for me to try again if my first passage went bad, and stayed bad, before I had experienced the joy in it.

**weavis** · 05-05-2014, 02:35

As a young physician in training, I was filled with a burning desire to change the world. 5 years on, and having worked with wiser experienced men and women, I came to understand a few immutable principles for living a life. And as an older physician now, the principles hold good.

Every single person is entitled to respect. This means, as a friend, a parent, a spouse and as a stranger. We have to respect every one enough to let them live their own life. To make their own path, and to let them succeed or fail on their own terms.
We need to be in FULL possession of ALL the facts before we can assess ANY situation.
When an event happens, and its not a good outcome, we need to ask ourself, "Is it my job to fix this?"
We need to see what help, if any, can be rendered in practical terms for people, if required to ensure they have lots of space to recover and regroup and regain heath or balance.
We need to ask ourselves a number of questions privately, "What can I learn from this episode if I am faced with a similar situation?"
"Would I have taken the route that was taken to arrive at the situation before me now?"
Am I allowing personal, religious or that inner set of rules (that we all have), or the outcome itself to influence my analysis of the situation?

There appears to be a lot of rancour regarding this situation. It would appear some C.F'ers have issue with the personality of the man. Some have issue with decisions made regarding his wife and children, and some have issues with post scenario handling of money.

Life law: We need to be in FULL possession of ALL the facts before we can assess ANY situation.

Even without all the facts, we are faced with the other life Principles to consider:

The journey is over, the vessel is no more, and life has forever changed for this family.

It is not our job to fix this.

Ours is to reflect on the situation and decide for ourselves whether we would have, firstly undertaken the journey, and secondly, what bits we would have done differently. We have the unique perspective of being observers and learning without the pain of experiencing results of choices and circumstances.

Reality is that there is NOTHING we can do. President Kennedy was shot. World wars happened, our parents died, the Titanic sank, and Rebel Hearts journey concluded when it did in the manner it did as a culmination of all things that led to it.

We cannot change a thing. It happened.

Eric cant change what happened, because he would if he could. And all the people irritated or morally outraged that he took his children with him, cant change a thing. All the people aggravated at his personality and attitude who feel a sense of karma in this, well thats ok too, he that lives by the sword dies by the sword, but......... thats a different issue to the CHOICE you would have made in preparing for this trip, and that is all that matters.

We get one go at this life thing. Some of us approach it quietly and some announce it on the Radio.

We are owed nothing by Rebel Heart.

The C.F. community, comprises of all sorts of people who write for a variety of reasons, and if they trumpet and blow, and then the quiet descends, well that is all there is. We are not Erics Mom or Pop or someone owed money, we are just associates, we are not even real friends REGARDLESS of what you think. He has other things to work out and needs to find the best path to live with himself and continue this life.

There is also the 50-50-90 rule: anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong. There is no starting over, you just have to live with the mistakes you have made, and that what you consider mistakes are not what others might.

It would be nice if at some stage, the crew of Rebel Heart tell their story. But you know what? It wont matter to some people. There will be no change in their view or positional stance. It will only inflame them more to convince the world that they are correct in their assessment of everything that happened. And truth is, they might have parts of it right, maybe all of it, and it doesn’t change a thing to what has happened. It can only change what we do in our lives.