Abandon Living Aboard

[Hudson Force]

There is a "flip side" to all of this. I left the last house I lived in when I left my parents home in the spring of 1964 at seventeen. .... off to a college dorm; a room in a fraternity house; a college apartment,- mattress on the floor and boards on bricks for shelving.... and then the boat.

There are the same anxieties and limitations to time spent in houses when your entire adult life has been on the boat. I'm pretty good with a few nights in a hotel room. I imagine a time when health may take me ashore, but I'm not prepared.

[Lubber4now]

Seems to me for some it's Jimmy Buffett.

For others it's Christopher Cross.

How about Jeremiah Johnsons.

Any feedback on those who wanted to leave their sorrows behind - be by themselves - who would answer "what trouble"?

Anyone? Do they just trade land for water?

Thanks

[zeehag]

10 percent make it.
mebbe only 10 percent are willing to go thru the tough stuff of which this lifestyle is made.
many have difficulty when they get into the reality as opposed to the promoted false dream encouraged in some specific songs.
mebbe the reality aspect is what makes these 90 percent fail.
life is not a jimmy buffet song, unless you are willing to work for it. hard work.

[laika]

I've been on the hard refitting the boat for an extended cruise for over a year now. My litmus test to if I'm really devoted to the lifestyle has been borne out by the fact that I've only gone slightly crazy thus far.

I was recently back out in CO for a few months living with some friends in a house. Played in the mountains everyday, yet almost never stopped thinking about the boat and the projects still to be accomplished. Was the same when I took a break to try and start a farm with some friends a while back.

I've been living on various boats off and on for 7 years now and only feel at home on a boat. I'm afraid life on land is boring

[ssanzone]

Originally Posted by RTB

If you get along well with your partner now, why would that change just because you are on a boat?

i would only argue that getting a long with someone while living in a big (multi room) living space is not the same as getting along with someone while living in a small (single room) living space.

Originally Posted by RTB

If you don't get along with each other now, it will not improve when you are cruising.

PREACH BROTHER!!!

i have a nomadic personality. regardless of if i am on land or water, i am not going to be in the same place too long.

time on board is great at the marina cuz i have a build in community that i never have in my neighborhood.

time underway is always an adventure (just not always sunshine and daisies).

i do struggle form time to time when i stop cruising to adjust to end of the adventure and return to 'real life' but it is the same when returning from vacation and have to go back to work.

question: how do those of you as year round live boards handle the holiday thing? do you fly 'home' for xmas or whatever? my fam is ALL about big gatherings and it is a 'thing' when one of us are not in attendance.

-s

[zeehag]

i do no t fly anywhere as my home is my boat.
i had to fly to phoenix, my mothers home, as my brother died aug 22, an dfamily neededme., but i spend holidays wherever i feel i want to be. i have christmassed in barra de navidad, and zihuatenejo an d mazatlan. no reason to fluy spmeh=where i dont want to go for a holiday

[BandB]

Originally Posted by ssanzone

question: how do those of you as year round live boards handle the holiday thing? do you fly 'home' for xmas or whatever? my fam is ALL about big gatherings and it is a 'thing' when one of us are not in attendance.

-s

Although not full time liveaboards, only about 2/3, one of the things we figured out quickly was we had to be with family and friends for the holidays. That time with them just is more important to us than anything. It refreshes us and readies us for more, too. This year we fly home from San Diego on December 15 and back on January 8. We will be refreshed and so ready to head toward the Panama Canal and a new adventure. And when we speak of family, it's not our birth families. This is family we've acquired along the way.

Now I know couples who are very happy away, who sometimes have family fly to them and sometimes they fly. Often if you're away in a nice locale, family can come to you for a very special holiday. Sometimes you're together only in spirit.

I know one couple who thought they'd be fine away but one week before Christmas they just couldn't take it anymore and flew home to family. They have every year since. They had said they wouldn't but agreed that had they stuck to that rule it would have given living aboard a very sour feeling. They would have for the first time regretted the choice. As it is with that promise to always spend Christmas with their kids and grandkids, they never feel they're sacrificing. Summer they get kids visiting and especially grandkids and have had the pleasure of giving their grandchildren summer vacations that few ever experience. So that's what they found worked for them. About three weeks home over the holidays each year and 49 weeks living aboard.

[Hudson Force]

Originally Posted by ssanzone

......................

question: how do those of you as year round live boards handle the holiday thing? do you fly 'home' for xmas or whatever?...................

This is a very telling question because it is phrased with the assumption that the boat and home are two different places. This is not the case for those that have lived aboard for decades. We do manage to sail to locations close to family and with children also now living on boats, we can find ports together. We do fly though! We've left the boat to fly to China, Ireland, The Amazon, New Zealand, Australia, Peru... all about! Our cruising is along the Westerrn North Atlantic from Maine to the Bahamas. We poke about here, but we fly out to spend a few weeks far away twice each year. When we find a secure place to stay after this hurricane season we'll fly to San Diego and spend a few weeks in Hawaii. We definitely fly home, but that's back to the boat.

[RTB]

When we left our home port two years ago, we were tied up at Houma, La. on Thanksgiving day. I think we went ashore for something to eat although it wasn't a traditional T-Day meal. Christmas was in Panama City. Last Christmas, we were anchored out at Bullochs Harbor, the Berry's. A cold front had arrived on Christmas Eve, and it was blowing stink. Santa didn't stop by the boat to fill our stockings!

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We haven't had turkey and dressing for two years. Since we are back in Texas at a marina, we will get to spend the holidays with family. It will be nice.

Ralph
Adult pool | sailing away with R & B

[oldragbaggers]

Originally Posted by BandB

Although not full time liveaboards, only about 2/3, one of the things we figured out quickly was we had to be with family and friends for the holidays. That time with them just is more important to us than anything. It refreshes us and readies us for more, too. This year we fly home from San Diego on December 15 and back on January 8. We will be refreshed and so ready to head toward the Panama Canal and a new adventure. And when we speak of family, it's not our birth families. This is family we've acquired along the way.

Now I know couples who are very happy away, who sometimes have family fly to them and sometimes they fly. Often if you're away in a nice locale, family can come to you for a very special holiday. Sometimes you're together only in spirit.

I know one couple who thought they'd be fine away but one week before Christmas they just couldn't take it anymore and flew home to family. They have every year since. They had said they wouldn't but agreed that had they stuck to that rule it would have given living aboard a very sour feeling. They would have for the first time regretted the choice. As it is with that promise to always spend Christmas with their kids and grandkids, they never feel they're sacrificing. Summer they get kids visiting and especially grandkids and have had the pleasure of giving their grandchildren summer vacations that few ever experience. So that's what they found worked for them. About three weeks home over the holidays each year and 49 weeks living aboard.

I agree with this and can already know that this is how it will be for us too. A weird turn in life events 10 years ago led to us living on the opposite coast from our daughter and grandchildren. We are a close family and had always been very involved in their lives. Making the adjustment to living far away from them was extremely difficult, but one thing that makes it all bearable is looking forward to our visits, especially at the holidays.

In a way it was a blessing that things happened the way they did and we have had this adjustment period to not having them living a few minutes away. Everything works out the way it is supposed to. Had this not happened I guess it is possible we would have found it too difficult to sail away from them when the time came. Now it has become "normal" that we don't live nearby and only see them a couple of times a year. But those times are precious to us and definitely is a tradition we would never want to break, no matter where we happen to be.

We hope that there will be occasions when they will want to join us cruising, but even if they don't we will go to them. Otherwise, I agree that it would sour the whole experience for us.

[BandB]

Originally Posted by oldragbaggers

Now it has become "normal" that we don't live nearby and only see them a couple of times a year. But those times are precious to us and definitely is a tradition we would never want to break, no matter where we happen to be.

Do you Skype with them as well? I know many grandparents and grandkids who are able to maintain their connection through Skype. Something about seeing who you're talking to that makes it seem almost as if you're there. Plus the kids often want to show you something.

[oldragbaggers]

Originally Posted by BandB

Do you Skype with them as well? I know many grandparents and grandkids who are able to maintain their connection through Skype. Something about seeing who you're talking to that makes it seem almost as if you're there. Plus the kids often want to show you something.

I really wish I could get my kids to Skype, but so far have had no luck with it. We Facetime on our iPhones from time to time but they are not big into technology and rarely have a computer that is working properly. I tried to set them up with it once but it just didn't seem to work out.

Maybe sometime in the future. I hope....

[Islandmike]

We lived on board Tivoli for 3 years, we loved it and would not change the experience for anything. We met so many great people and saw so much . However, we just got to the point where we wanted to move back on the land, basically needed money, but we still own Tivoli. It is our weekend getaway. You never know what the future may bring, I can tell you that I am so very lucky that Paula is 100% on board and has been from the beginning.

Mike & Paula
S/V Tivoli

[Hudson Force]

One month, one year, ten years, fifty years......? It makes no difference. If you spend some time cruising and/or living aboard and then you abandon the life on the water and move to land, this change does not represent a failure any more than the original move away from the land represented a failure.

[rognvald]

For a true liveaboard that does not have the conveniences of-- nor live in a liveaboard marina, the pitfalls for those who are not truly commited are:
1. Garbage disposal
2. Laundry
3. Provisioning
4. Water
5. Maintenance
6. Finding secure anchorages during storm conditions
7. Bottom cleaning
8. Illness and/or injury
9. Lack of time spent with adult children/grandchildren/family
10. Need for more living space/shoreside amenities
11. 24/7 time spent together
12. The ultimate awareness of Reality vs. the Dream

We lived aboard ten years and witnessed the death of the dream in the majority of those we met. The Cruising World stereotype does not match the reality of the experience. Only the truly committed will survive and I would describe them as counter cultural in their beliefs and their views on life. It is not an easy life, but the rewards outnumber the difficulties. Good luck and good sailing.