advice: sailing/navigation experience and finding community

[Nicholson58]

Lots of good advice and encouragement here. Good folks and community on CF.

Between the lines I see:

1. You would welcome getting away from France. We still do not know if you want to stay in the EU, Mediterranean. Probably not a bad short term plan to gain a bit of wet experience.

2. You have excellent English Language ability. I assume also French. Curious, others?

We have been cruising the Caribbean from Puerto Rico, Bonaire and East since 2016. We have met many bilingual French and Belgian cruisers and have more warm friends now than we ever had on land. We joined the Salty Dawgs for our transit from the US and have stayed members. This turned out to be an introduction to 80 like minded folks and more each year. If you choose to join the annual European exodus to the Caribbean in October-November look for the Dawg flags and/or join. We also joined the OCC, Ocean Cruising Club. Look for the flying fish flag. These two organizations have a lot to offer cruisers in both community and assistance.

There is a used yacht brokerage in Antigua, Lighthouse. We know the owners. They are reputable an have been doing a big business last season. Any people find buying ing a Caribbean ready boat is preferred to crossing the pond.

We see several boats single handed by men. There are a few single handed women cruising but many ladies look for or have found a crew friend. There are services including CF to help locate crew for transit or delivery assistance. It’s more difficult to find a compatible partner.

The Caribbean is opening up. Even Trinidad is making moves to re-open in the last few weeks. As a French or EU citizen the French Caribbean islands are more or less open to you. They are a bit difficult for the rest of us but we hope the next season will be easier. We spent all of last season in Antigua due to their relatively open policy. One can sail into Dutch St Martin without a COVID test and then walk/dinghy to the French side. Return to Antigua is easy. Entry to the USVI And Puerto Rico is mostly open. The BVI is presently impossible. The rest of the Windward, Leewards are mostly open with a few remaining hoops such as Covid tests still in place. We (cruisers) believe that vaccinated people will be given an easier pass next season. Some islands are trying to get their people vaccinated and some offer the vaccine free to anyone who walks in the door. (Antigua).

Many boats migrate back to Europe in May. Some choose to cruise the US east coast and Canada. Canada is still a problem but the latest noise says this may change soon. Frankly, it must. Canada has been slower to vaccinate. The US is over 70% now and vaccination is free and nearly walk-in. Some boats stay in the Caribbean through hurricane season. There are many safe harbors and warning for a named storm is about 4-5 days. This is more than enough to scramble out of the way, usually south and without checkout or protocols.

[Briggers]

There is a reason it’s called “self confidence” no one else can give it to you.

Find a boat that you like, I would suggest between 30’ and 40’ . Then find a recommended surveyor to make sure the boat is fit for purpose and there is no major work to do.

Then get in it and go sailing, take someone with you if it makes you comfortable but don’t make a habit of it. Do this till you are confident you can set the sails and anchor on your own and get into and out of a marina berth without causing too much damage.

Buy the charts for the route to your intended destination and plot a course, then follow it. There’s no rush with this, you will see places and people on the way that you might want to spend some time on. The ultimate destination will always be there - even if it might change from time to time.

If you are looking for a destination, I bought a boat in Croatia with the sole intention of sailing her back to Essex in the UK - that was until I got there and found out how beautiful it is. I did ultimately sail her to the UK - much of it single handed without auto helm, including the Bay of Biscay and Le Manch.

My new boat is once again in Croatia and is likely to stay there. One good thing about Croatian waters it that the tide is about 0.25m 😁

Good luck

[Dave Isom]

G’day Wolfie, crikey there’s a lot to digest, from you and replies so I’ll try to be brief .
1. You don’t need more formal qualifications but hands on experience as crew.
2. You’ve clearly had some bad experience as crew with males so DON’T crew with just one other single male. Get on bigger boats with mixed crew...make that a rule.
There are plenty of female skippers around, seek them out if that makes you feel more comfortable.
3. Try and work out where in the world you’d like to sail ( Covid permitting) and look for crewing opportunities there. Go with experienced skippers on newish boats.Deliveries could be ok but with older boats you don’t know what you’re getting and there could be safety issues.
4. Don’t buy a boat yet until you’re more confident and even then take an experienced crew( male and female) with you until you can handle the boat and feel confident. With all the courses you’ve done you don’t need more advice about what’s required with boat handling, sails, reefing, getting on and off moorings , navigation etc which I assume would have been well covered. You now need hands on experience not theory.
Good luck and well done to you for all the effort you’ve put in so far !

[Buzzman]

Hey, Wolfie,
From one nervous nellie beginner to another - I feel your pain! I am yet to even anchor out, as all my sailing has been off the beach or off the boat ramp, and precious little of that.
I get the 'children leash', but really, once they are settled, they will WANT you to go, and get out of their hair!
When you 'cut the lines', it will be more than just the mooring lines, remember, so you probably need to practice that also. Let them swim a bit. Let them learn to cope. And recognise that this is also what you 'need' to do.
Question: was that remote boatyard in France Porte du Rhone? If not, suggest you have a look at 'Wlidlings Sailing' on YT. Young couple restoring an old catamaran, living on the hard, on a pittance, in the Porte.
My point being - visit the yard, look at ALL the boats for sale (loads) and pick one needing less work than Wildlings cat, as the Med is a hop step and a jump away, while Paris is only a TGV trip - if *necessary*. No tides, not as many rocks to bash into as Brittany, weather reasonably predictable, forecasts usually pretty accurate, better weather than up north (most of the time), yahdah yahdah...
And there's a great community in the yard, and you can do lots of short 'hops' to explore the south coast, over to the Balearics where this is a big expat community, ditto southern Spain....
And maybe do as others have suggested and sign on for crewing experiences as well, or as a precursor while you are waiting for the house to settle.
Do you have enough to afford a flat on the outskirts (or within reach) of Paris, AND to buy a 35ft boat? Not quite cutting the apron strings I know, but perhaps one of the kids could house-sit for you while you are offshore and away? At least you then have an alternative if the sailing thing doesn't work out after a few years.
Will you have enough to live off? That's a question no-one has asked as far as I can see. Or do you need to buy a flat and rent it out while you are gone, so as to have some sort of regular income? Will you be paying down your accumulated capital while sailing, or is it invested such that you will be living off the interest only, and not reducing the capital amount?
Because sure as eggs go with bacon, you will not be sailing forever, and will one day need to swallow the anchor.
Oh, and if you need any more solo female sailor confidence building, check out Wind Hippie Sailing on YT. She's got her small boat across the Atlantic and is cruising the Carib as we speak. And she is definitely not the only one out there...
You will not be 'solo'. The cruising community will take you under their wing and ensure ife is never dull. As here, if you ask a question, you will get an answer. Usually more than one! lol
Whatever you do,
Enjoy!

[CruiseN]

Originally Posted by double u

sorry, couldn't resist...

Neither could I. Sea saw that?
Whether unknown really.

Worth a study break, is sailboat fuel.

[john manning]

Hi,
Stop worrying about your ability and start sailing.
With your background you will find it easy, do not worry about making some mistakes. I am still doing that after more than 40 years of sailing.

[Mickeyrouse]

We all reach our comfort levels in different ways. My first boat was a kit boat. It sank 3 hours after launching. After pump-out, the first time I sailed it I literally had one hand on the tiller and and a $1 “Golden Guide to Sailing” in the other. Your pre-sail training is impressive enough to look “ expert”. I sailed every chance I got, which was a lot. I’ve now been doing this almost 50 years. I’ve been through boats from a Sunfish to the 41 footer we now have.
Do not expect your first boat to be your ultimate boat. Sail with something you can afford to make mistakes on, so the financial impact of mistakes is not a catastrophe. Confidence will only come with doing it.

[Spot]

WG,
Great turnout on our thread!
Your PM mailbox might be full.
Cordially, Spot

[Nomad57]

Originally Posted by Buzzman

Hey, Wolfie,
...snip
Will you have enough to live off? That's a question no-one has asked as far as I can see. Or do you need to buy a flat and rent it out while you are gone, so as to have some sort of regular income? Will you be paying down your accumulated capital while sailing, or is it invested such that you will be living off the interest only, and not reducing the capital amount?
Because sure as eggs go with bacon, you will not be sailing forever, and will one day need to swallow the anchor.
...another snip

If only it were that simple. Even if someone lives off the interest only, and not reducing the capital amount, that capital amount probably will not be enough to "swallow the anchor", and return to the earth. Real estate prices seem to be going nowhere but up, which can make it difficult or impossible to get back in to the housing market, after a period of time spent sailing.

More than a few people have made the decision to "sell everything, go sailing", only to return to an untenable position. The choice sometimes seems to come down to sailing off into the horizon, living "the dream", and ending up living one's "golden years" in penury. Or securing your future, and leaving it all behind when you leave this mortal coil.

Choices, choices.

Nomad

[double u]

Originally Posted by Nomad57

...

More than a few people have made the decision to "sell everything, go sailing", only to return to an untenable position. ... and ending up living one's "golden years" in penury. ...

Nomad

for each one of those, that "went sailing" & now "are in penury": how many are there, that have reached their "golden"(?) years, well & secure, live in comfort -
& have to look back at a life where the most exciting thing was the xmas party of the company, the wedding of the kids? 100.000?
one of the most famous cruisers of "our" times had carved on the main bulkhead of his boat:
"Grab a chance, & you wont be sorry for a "might have been!" (Eric Hiscock)

[donradcliffe]

Wolfie, please clear enough space in your PM mailbox for me to send you one.

[dannc]

Originally Posted by double u

for each one of those, that "went sailing" & now "are in penury": how many are there, that have reached their "golden"(?) years, well & secure, live in comfort -
& have to look back at a life where the most exciting thing was the xmas party of the company, the wedding of the kids? 100.000?
one of the most famous cruisers of "our" times had carved on the main bulkhead of his boat:
"Grab a chance, & you wont be sorry for a "might have been!" (Eric Hiscock)

Company's have XMAS parties? Who knew? Gee, I don't even have that excitement to remember on my death bed.

Later,
Dan

[wolfgal]

sorry guys, i just realised that this thread was continuing on its own... (i stopped getting emails for each post). however, CF does notify for full inboxes (thanks CF)!!!!

ok, so yes... so many more sincere responses! so many. thanks so much!
and so many decisions to make...

first off, a couple folks here seem worried that i'm one of those, sell-everythng-n-go types, but, rest assured, i'm not. i used to be that girl who jumped off of sicily's lava cliffs from crazy heights into the swirling blue, giggling the whoooooooole way down, but life has taught me a few lessons since then (i've got quite a few scar stories!). yes, i've been working on this plan for quite a while now, covering my bases bit by bit while saving, quite seriously, hard core.

am now focused on setting up a simple, fall-back place (that could also be used by one of my squirrels, if needed, or rented out for more income or even just locked up), located not too far from all the necessities, without the need for a car, perfect for the swallowed-the-anchor years, ...if i get any. am going to re-visit a place i saw this week, next week: it could do the trick. in any case, i'm viewing places with this plan in mind.

after having scoped out so many places all over, i decided to go small and practical ...a place for a salty old lady with (by then surely) a cane. not the gorgeous areas of brittany or wherever as these places require one to already have community and a car to survive, just a pragmatic, practical place in an area where i can easily get my bearings again, after a fair amount of time at sea.

for the boat: my feeling is not to make a move on a boat until "seller's season" is over. owners' listing prices are just as high as their hopes these days over here, and anything even near the med is double priced these days.

and, after having wasted years of my life drooling over gorgeous boats that are inaccessible over here (grief, i love boats!), now i'm looking for a specific boat (once again, small and practical) that is easily found over here (so CE conform and vat paid), that can comfortably do the med, the canals and rivers, and take me to amsterdam (geez, to sail into amsterdam!), and further north... i'm thinking sound and practical.

and, it will be a busy summer. i'm committed to helping out a bit (hard to say no)... learning to change a hot water heater, finish cleaning diesel bug from tanks, and doing some wood work on an old boat that i love-to-love, in the south. i'm looking forward to this. i really like doing teak work and think that it could be a way to be useful out there, once out there. i am a good assistant (an excellent one actually), but i need to learn skills where i know everything, from A to Z. and since i actually enjoy doing teak work...

and, grief, august/sept, i will also be going through stuff in the house (THIS is the hard part, too many emotional decisions involved!!). then there's the move... luckily, i've committed to leaving all furniture behind, with the exception of a table.

in between and thereafter, why not do a a delivery? the English delivery companies you guys suggested look great. once again experience is clearly what i need most. (experience and community, and yes, self-confidence)

someone said that sailing brought about lots of friendships. i'm glad to hear this, because this is one of my at-the-core reasons. yes, i'm looking forward to the quality of those interactions with people along the way...

thanks again everyone! you've been so very kind. much appreciated!

wolfie

[john manning]

Originally Posted by wolfgal

sorry guys, i just realised that this thread was continuing on its own... (i stopped getting emails for each post). however, CF does notify for full inboxes (thanks CF)!!!!

ok, so yes... so many more sincere responses! so many. thanks so much!
and so many decisions to make...

first off, a couple folks here seem worried that i'm one of those, sell-everythng-n-go types, but, rest assured, i'm not. i used to be that girl who jumped off of sicily's lava cliffs from crazy heights into the swirling blue, giggling the whoooooooole way down, but life has taught me a few lessons since then (i've got quite a few scar stories!). yes, i've been working on this plan for quite a while now, covering my bases bit by bit while saving, quite seriously, hard core.

am now focused on setting up a simple, fall-back place (that could also be used by one of my squirrels, if needed, or rented out for more income or even just locked up), located not too far from all the necessities, without the need for a car, perfect for the swallowed-the-anchor years, ...if i get any. am going to re-visit a place i saw this week, next week: it could do the trick. in any case, i'm viewing places with this plan in mind.

after having scoped out so many places all over, i decided to go small and practical ...a place for a salty old lady with (by then surely) a cane. not the gorgeous areas of brittany or wherever as these places require one to already have community and a car to survive, just a pragmatic, practical place in an area where i can easily get my bearings again, after a fair amount of time at sea.

for the boat: my feeling is not to make a move on a boat until "seller's season" is over. owners' listing prices are just as high as their hopes these days over here, and anything even near the med is double priced these days.

and, after having wasted years of my life drooling over gorgeous boats that are inaccessible over here (grief, i love boats!), now i'm looking for a specific boat (once again, small and practical) that is easily found over here (so CE conform and vat paid), that can comfortably do the med, the canals and rivers, and take me to amsterdam (geez, to sail into amsterdam!), and further north... i'm thinking sound and practical.

and, it will be a busy summer. i'm committed to helping out a bit (hard to say no)... learning to change a hot water heater, finish cleaning diesel bug from tanks, and doing some wood work on an old boat that i love-to-love, in the south. i'm looking forward to this. i really like doing teak work and think that it could be a way to be useful out there, once out there. i am a good assistant (an excellent one actually), but i need to learn skills where i know everything, from A to Z. and since i actually enjoy doing teak work...

and, grief, august/sept, i will also be going through stuff in the house (THIS is the hard part, too many emotional decisions involved!!). then there's the move... luckily, i've committed to leaving all furniture behind, with the exception of a table.

in between and thereafter, why not do a a delivery? the English delivery companies you guys suggested look great. once again experience is clearly what i need most. (experience and community, and yes, self-confidence)

someone said that sailing brought about lots of friendships. i'm glad to hear this, because this is one of my at-the-core reasons. yes, i'm looking forward to the quality of those interactions with people along the way...

thanks again everyone! you've been so very kind. much appreciated!

wolfie

Are you really looking for a yacht or do you just want a queue of men who are looking for the perfect woman?

[wolfgal]

Originally Posted by john manning

Are you really looking for a yacht or do you just want a queue of men who are looking for the perfect woman?

good point and well taken...

and this is because, when you think about it, you can understand how hard it has been to crew all these years. the men, well, no description required, and the wives quite simply want me off the boat.

the truth is i need to grow, get confident and all that... in a big way. this is about something fundamental