Cruising Forum Member in Distres-Judy Jensen & wingless Fred

[bensolomon]

Fred,

I am so sorry Judy passed. My sincerest condolences.

Ben

[Jamme]

My deepest condolences. She’s hopefully sailing the skies on a beam reach and warm, gentle breeze.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NrmCwUB6Fzk

[senormechanico]

Fred,


There is no question you lost a jewel.
On the other hand, your life was very blessed having that jewel for a time.
Keep her memory in your heart forever.

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by bensolomon

Fred,

I am so sorry Judy passed. My sincerest condolences.

Ben

Thank you

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by senormechanico

Fred,


There is no question you lost a jewel.
On the other hand, your life was very blessed having that jewel for a time.
Keep her memory in your heart forever.

Absolutely! I was blessed with having her for 40 years and she will be in my memory forever, but it was not enough

[JPA Cate]

It would never be "enough." But one of you has to go first. And she gave you 100% of what she had to give.

Bless you both.

Ann

[wingssail]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

I And she gave you 100% of what she had to give.

Ann, that is the most profound statement anyone has made to me about this, Judy gave me 100% of what she had to give, and in the end, that included her life.

I've known for years that Judy found life on the boat increasingly difficult, due to health issues and increasing frailties, that she felt that living ashore would be easier. But I wouldn't hear of it. I said we could change a little here and there, even revise how we sailed the boat so sailing was easier, and I could help her more around the boat in our daily living, so we could keep on doing it.

Judy sucked it up and kept on, without complaint, doing whatever she had to do so that we could continue this life. So we could live on the boat, sail the boat, and race the boat. Of course we both loved it, but it came at a great cost to her.

In the end she went in for an operation which might make some things easier so we could continue living aboard, an operation which killed her.

Yes, she gave 100% of what she had to give.

I am dumb struck and shattered by the depth her sacrifice.

[JPA Cate]

Fred, don't fall into a guilt trap, mate. We all make decisions, and not all of them work out how we'd planned. Judy's choices were her own, according to her values, shaped by her world view and the challenges she faced.

If you've the heart for it, listen to the Seeman's Liede that Jamme posted the You Tube for...

All the best, mate, tough, tough times.

Ann

[JPA Cate]

Ya know guys, now that Judy's gone, Fred has only family and friends to help him through the rough times, and he has not told his friends here yet, how much he needs to be able to keep his head above the water of the hospital and doctor debt.

The gofundme is apparently expired, but it had raised about 1/3 of the ask. How can Fred deal with things now? and how can we show ongoing support? grieving takes a long time...

Ann

[requiem]

Fred, I'm so very sorry to hear this. Do let us know what else may be done to assist.