Horrible Guests, Terrible Crew

[cyan]

Originally Posted by Cadence

Two users that wouldn't contribute, a sex offender and a drunk.

Sounds like a good start for a novel. Lots of time to write on a passage. Ship of Tools.

[Cadence]

Originally Posted by Kenomac

Generally no, not a problem at all, tomorrow my good friend Eugenio will show up for our sail back to Italy.

Remember, we’ve been doing this for eight years with many, many successes behind us and the last three were vetted as well as possible. I worked side by side with the sex offender for five years, thirty five years ago, he was our general manager for our music company. His problems with health issues and pornography began 10 years ago.

It was unknown the guy from five years ago was a drunk, he was the boat broker who sold us our Hunter 450, claimed he did deliveries.

Try me next time, a crochety old 75 yr. old cripple. My only requirement is keep me in pills and beer.

[Kenomac]

Originally Posted by cyan

Sounds like a good start for a novel. Lots of time to write on a passage. Ship of Tools.

“Ship of Tools.” Awesome.

[Training Wheels]

Throw in some scantily clad, fit young women, and you could make a ton of money on YouTube. You could be the next star!

[belizesailor]

This thread underscores why I strongly prefer to only take on crew I know well and vice versa (only crew for those I know well).

Im always a bit skeptical of those who seem to be constantly looking for crew. What...no friends or family who will sail with you? Thats likely a clue! Or is it really a commercial venture, pretending to be recreational, and no friends or family are willing to pay to sail with you? (Note: I using "you" generically here, not in reference to any posters on this thread).

In my case, I can expand the potential crew list quite a lot by including former sailing students. Many of whom have become friends. At least Ive spent some time on a boat with them and vice versa.

Thats easy enough to do for recreational trips. For commercial, you are usually stuck with the guests/crew that you draw, but at least the rules of the game are more clearly defined...and Im a lot less hesistant to exercise my authority in a commercial setting.


We had a lot of friends come visit this cruising seaon. Too many really...it began to feel like being back in the charter biz, but without the revenue!

We did learn that a few of them will be ashore only friends in the future...those who thought they WERE on a vacation charter! [emoji849]

[belizesailor]

....and it does all go right sometimes too...good sailing with good friends:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/a1xymokpmd...as_HD.mp4?dl=0

[Uricanejack]

I take the warning about facebook and the internet seriously.
How you would know the perverts history? Well you wouldn't would you. I've never found crew from the internet. Or had the courage to crew via the internet. yet many people say it works out well.

The "friends" as they say with friends like that. who needs enemy's?

I have a "Friend" with similar habits, actually he is a relative of my wife's. Unfortunately you cant choose relatives. We put up with him for many years. Now even my wife has had enough. So we have never taken him sailing.
Oddly he can be generous in other ways. So we have not cut him of completely.

My boat, is like my home. My door is open, so long as you are willing to accept us as we are. You are welcome to visit. I don't drink but I will offer you one.

My suggestion is don't change who you are. Just because you had a couple of bad experiences. As you said most of your experiences have been good.
Keep your hospitality the way it is, continue to act with generosity to your friends and guests. The good ones will appreciate it and reciprocate. You will be respected and well like because of your actions.

PS my mum was an RN. She taught and trained many RN's Most of her closest friends are or were also RN's. Its a profession or vocation for those who are caring, giving, loving and generous.

[Island Time O25]

Actually if the perv was convicted in US he would be in the sex registry which is public. So perhaps thiz would be the first place to check names of potential crew.

Also with anyone I do not know personally I would want a basic criminal background check. After all you're letting them into your home, perhaps next to your family and loved ones. If they balk that would also be a good clue. As would be too many gang or prison tattoos.

When I was a newbie in RE my then mentor taught me to always start with checking the potential renter's previous lanlords references first as the current landlord is only too happy to rid off a troublesome tenant by giving a glowing reference.

[jtsailjt]

Originally Posted by belizesailor

This thread underscores why I strongly prefer to only take on crew I know well and vice versa (only crew for those I know well).

Im always a bit skeptical of those who seem to be constantly looking for crew. What...no friends or family who will sail with you? Thats likely a clue! Or is it really a commercial venture, pretending to be recreational, and no friends or family are willing to pay to sail with you? (Note: I using "you" generically here, not in reference to any posters on this thread).

In my case, I can expand the potential crew list quite a lot by including former sailing students. Many of whom have become friends. At least Ive spent some time on a boat with them and vice versa.

! [emoji849]

Don’t be too skeptical of those who have difficulty finding good crew. Many of us don’t have a pool of past sailing students to draw from. Of course friends and family like to come sailing, but I happen to be the only sailor in my family and most of my friends don’t sail either, or they have jobs or family commitments that prevent them from committing to a week or two at sea. Since I’m an airline pilot I happen to know quite a few other pilot sailors who have work schedules that allow them to crew (and can fly for free) and that source has worked pretty well for me, but everyone doesn’t happen to have a pool of airline pilot/sailor or sailing student friends to draw from and that’s through no fault of theirs.

Also, sometimes sleep deprivation does funny things to people. I had one crew who I knew well and who had a boat of his own but after 4 days aboard he had a personality change from what I’d ever seen before from him. We had fuel filter issues and were short tacking to get to a harbor where I knew replacing Racor would be easy but as I was below making dinner he overruled me and changed our destination to a slightly closer harbor with no services available and a tricky entrance. Once I figured out what he’d done it would have been difficult and time consuming to sail to our original destination so I accepted it. It cost me $$ and time but I didn’t make a real big deal about it right then, but he’ll never set foot on another boat of mine again.

[Kenomac]

Originally Posted by jtsailjt

Don’t be too skeptical of those who have difficulty finding good crew. Many of us don’t have a pool of past sailing students to draw from. Of course friends and family like to come sailing, but I happen to be the only sailor in my family and most of my friends don’t sail either, or they have jobs or family commitments that prevent them from committing to a week or two at sea. Since I’m an airline pilot I happen to know quite a few other pilot sailors who have work schedules that allow them to crew (and can fly for free) and that source has worked pretty well for me, but everyone doesn’t happen to have a pool of airline pilot/sailor or sailing student friends to draw from and that’s through no fault of theirs.

Also, sometimes sleep deprivation does funny things to people. I had one crew who I knew well and who had a boat of his own but after 4 days aboard he had a personality change from what I’d ever seen before from him. We had fuel filter issues and were short tacking to get to a harbor where I knew replacing Racor would be easy but as I was below making dinner he overruled me and changed our destination to a slightly closer harbor with no services available and a tricky entrance. Once I figured out what he’d done it would have been difficult and time consuming to sail to our original destination so I accepted it. It cost me $$ and time but I didn’t make a real big deal about it right then, but he’ll never set foot on another boat of mine again.

That’s nothing...

When the drunk was onboard our boat five years ago, I went below for ten minutes and he felt the need to change course 180 degrees to head directly towards Spanish warships conducting live fire exercises off the coast of Cartegena. I can only imagine what would have happened in the United States.

He said he was worried I was going to kill both of us by running into the cliffs, I pointed out to him.... “that’s The Cartegena harbor entrance.”

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by jtsailjt

Don’t be too skeptical of those who have difficulty finding good crew. Many of us don’t have a pool of past sailing students to draw from. Of course friends and family like to come sailing, but I happen to be the only sailor in my family and most of my friends don’t sail either, or they have jobs or family commitments that prevent them from committing to a week or two at sea. Since I’m an airline pilot I happen to know quite a few other pilot sailors who have work schedules that allow them to crew (and can fly for free) and that source has worked pretty well for me, but everyone doesn’t happen to have a pool of airline pilot/sailor or sailing student friends to draw from and that’s through no fault of theirs.

Also, sometimes sleep deprivation does funny things to people. I had one crew who I knew well and who had a boat of his own but after 4 days aboard he had a personality change from what I’d ever seen before from him. We had fuel filter issues and were short tacking to get to a harbor where I knew replacing Racor would be easy but as I was below making dinner he overruled me and changed our destination to a slightly closer harbor with no services available and a tricky entrance. Once I figured out what he’d done it would have been difficult and time consuming to sail to our original destination so I accepted it. It cost me $$ and time but I didn’t make a real big deal about it right then, but he’ll never set foot on another boat of mine again.

I understand of course that there are mitigating factors which prevent some from having easy access to crew...but there are others who cant get crew for a reason (maybe several).

Ive met a few crew along the way who had just bailed on difficult captains...and also difficult crew who had been jetisoned by captains.

And yes, sleep depravation etc and long periods offshore can do odd things to people...Ive seen a few offshore melt downs. In many ways personalities are at least as important as skills offshore. But, you dont always know till they are out there.

I had several friends who were all competent sailors crew for me once. The weather turned a bit rough and they all got dibilitatingly sea sick. It wasnt that bad, but none had sailed a cat before...one reason they signed up. Aparrently the different motion was enough to do them all in.

[Kenomac]

Originally Posted by belizesailor

I understand of course that there are mitigating factors which prevent some from having easy access to crew...but there are others who cant get crew for a reason (maybe several).

Ive met a few crew along the way who had just bailed on difficult captains.

I’m not difficult to get along with, I already have five people lined up for next May. Blue collar, unpretentious, hard working appreciative people... like ourselves. Two registered nurses a diesel mechanic/electrician, hardwood flooring contractor and a sculptor, all with plenty of sailing experience. No yacht club layabouts, no shortage of people who want to join us.

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by Kenomac

I’m not difficult to get along with, I already have five people lined up for next May. Blue collar, unpretentious, hard working appreciative people... like ourselves. Two registered nurses a diesel mechanic/electrician, hardwood flooring contractor and a sculptor, all with plenty of sailing experience. No yacht club layabouts.

I wasnt referring to you personally, just a general observation.

You dont seem to have any trouble attracting crew...just the misfortune of attracting a few real winners! [emoji1787]

Ive never had major problems with crew, only a few minor ones, but maybe you guys are helping my luck by attracting the special ones. [emoji1787]

[SV Siren]

People are like a bag of apples. They all look good until you get into the bag and find one or two that just aren't right. You will always find one bad apple, but don't let that spoil the rest.

There is something about sailing and being out on the water that strips away the façade that some people seem to put up, and then you get to see the real person behind the façade. I've seen it a few too many times, heck even I when I was younger had a few misconceptions that were quickly shown to me, but I learned what reality was and enjoyed the moment.

[jtsailjt]

Originally Posted by belizesailor

I wasnt referring to you personally, just a general observation.

You dont seem to have any trouble attracting crew...just the misfortune of attracting a few real winners! [emoji1787]

Ive never had major problems with crew, only a few minor ones, but maybe you guys are helping my luck by attracting the special ones. [emoji1787]

Pretty much everyone can say the same thing....right up until they can’t. Eventually the odds catch up with all of us and we get stuck with a bad apple that seemed just fine when we left port. Once the bad apple reveals himself about all a good skipper can do is make whatever adjustment to the watch schedule is appropriate to get his vessel safely to the next port and the “problem child” ashore. It’s not realistic to check into the possibility of every crew member being a registered sex offender and it’s pretty tough to guess ahead of time who will have a big personality change after a few days at sea or the first time they see a wave wash over the deck. Some people have better sources of qualified crew than others but eventually I think it’s pretty safe to say we can all be taken by surprise by someone who turns out to not be what they seemed.