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Leo Ticheli · 08-01-2017, 16:15

Perhaps I've just been lucky, but I've never encountered a more helpful bunch than sailors. They race to help you dock, share their experience and expertise, lend expensive tools, give you spares, warn you about weather and local conditions, all but force-feed you, and pour liquor into your glass.

I have run across a very few who are less forthcoming, but I suspect they are dealing with some great unpleasantness in their lives. They are the exception. Outside the military, I can't think of another bunch that are not only fully prepared to risk their lives to save you when you are in peril, but would jump at the chance to do so.

Fair winds to all,

Leo

uncle stinkybob · 08-01-2017, 16:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by sartorst

There past experiences
There was the time I stopped to help a disabled power boat and offered a tow to my marine they wanted a tow to a marine 6 miles the other direction after all how would they get to there car??????
There was the time I towed a sailboat to my marina after docking I walked over to give help or advise turns out it needed a head gasket his offer to fix it -----------A six pack !!! I find out later his occupation stock broker !
There was the time a club member asked if I would help on a bottom job "ok" When I get there at 9am he is miffed because he had been there since 6am waiting What he had done -----------------Nothing I was waiting on you he said
Stopped to help a lady with a flat as I finish the task her son drives up! the LADY had not mentioned that he was on the way!!!!!!
There was the time a guy in the marine that came over and asked to borrow a tool one thing led to another I realize he and his friend are making a dangerous mess of there wiring so I spend the better part of a day of my life working on his boat wiring for a beer and a thank you to find out later he is worth millions!!!
There was the time a guy walks up and say's Someone on the dock said you were a good mechanic can you help me? I have a look at the engine and it is a POS. When I decline he say's If you are so good why can't you work on it ?
There was the time I went up a guy's mast to do something for him and the next time I see him he want's to know what I may have done to damage his wind instruments "they are not working" I did not touch them!
I Know I Know There are those of you out there saying but you volunteered and YOU are the Type person I intend to avoid
TOOO many people ask of others time with no respect of others TIME!!!!

Honestly, it sounds to me that you have failed to make your expectations clear before you offered your "help". I try not to have expectation on anybody for anything anymore, much less disappointment with people that way. If I offer help, I feel a little better about me, that's my payout, it is not dependent on your response. I think most people in the world are undeserving, selfish freaks anyway, so I do limit my offers of help. Family first, friends second, not much spare time after that anyway.

meatservo · 08-01-2017, 16:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Leo Ticheli

Perhaps I've just been lucky, but I've never encountered a more helpful bunch than sailors. They race to help you dock, share their experience and expertise, lend expensive tools, give you spares, warn you about weather and local conditions, all but force-feed you, and pour liquor into your glass.

I have run across a very few who are less forthcoming, but I suspect they are dealing with some great unpleasantness in their lives. They are the exception. Outside the military, I can't think of another bunch that are not only fully prepared to risk their lives to save you when you are in peril, but would jump at the chance to do so.

Fair winds to all,

Leo

We can drink beer together!

meatservo

Steve Bean · 08-01-2017, 16:31

My favorite kind of good turn is when nobody but me knows who did it!

tomdidit · 08-01-2017, 16:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pelagic

Sartorst, what works for me is this mindset;

'I never do something for anyone else!! ....I do it because it makes ME feel good.'

That way I never go into it with expectations.

BTW, which dock are you on....my head needs fixing [emoji2]

I like your mindset, and that of many others in this thread. I once read a book titled "Looking out for #1" and really enjoyed it. Many people passed on the book because of the title, but the bottom line is many times doing the right thing and feeling good about it is "looking out for # 1". This thread started as an understandable downer and is ending up being uplifting. Thanks!

Steve, I also like your point about doing it so only you know.

sartorst · 08-01-2017, 16:50

Don't get me wrong I have felt good about helping many times and made some great friends through the years by helping and being helped Guess I was feeling pissy after reading a few Help me threads

Cap Erict3 · 08-01-2017, 18:31

It must be something in the air. I have been reminiscing on "pay it forward" incidents today. Even put the DVD on. The practice has a long history and millions of people around the world believe that paying a true kindness back is impossible, so they pay it forward.

Rich and poor quietly reach out and touch other lives.

chris mac · 08-01-2017, 19:41

Steve bean, 👍
When I was a teenager I worked in a small town convenience store. A long haul trucker would stop in periodically and just bs with me for a while.
He would randomly pick out people in the store and point them out to me. When they came up to pay, I would tell them it was free, store promotion or whatever. He would pay their bill but never wanted anyone to know.
He told me his story, grew up poor but turned it around and was doing well because of random help from strangers. Now he gets pleasure from paying it forward.
That always stuck with me.
I've done it a couple times now, it's a really great feeling. especially when it's obvious that they could use a hand.
For whatever weird reason, I also enjoy pulling people out of the ditch in winter. Sitting in -20 for a few hours waiting for a tow truck is a very special level of hell!

meatservo · 08-01-2017, 19:49

I remember being in a supermarket in rural N.C. to attend a funeral, elderly Black couple had a problem paying for their groceries, I told the clerk I got this, remarkable expression form the clerk, but they were appreciative and left with their groceries...

meatservo

**JPA Cate** · 08-01-2017, 20:21

Remember the old bumper sticker: "Commit random acts of kindness"

RaymondR · 08-01-2017, 22:52

I have been a chronic good Samaritan and have had good and bad experiences with it. I know good Samaritanism is a bad habit and serious character deficiency and whilst I have become better at resisting appeals for assistance generally give in and volunteer to help. I think it's one of those habits that if you get it early in life you are stuck with it. Does make you feel good and I have made some long term friends of people I have assisted so I'll probably stick with it. I am also finding my head easier to live with since I decided to allow what I do to define my view of life rather than what other people do.

The trouble with putting everyone into the mongrel box is you never get to know anyone.

DumnMad · 08-01-2017, 23:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

Sounds like the OP needs to hang out with a better class of boater, or simply better people. I’ve always found I get back what I put out.

True, hang out with a better class of boater, but I have some sympathy for the OP. I never got the impression he didn't like helping people.
Valid points about helping for the enjoyment of helping, however, if you have your own stuff that needs doing it must be frustrating when someone is really keen to exploit your generosity even though they have far more resources than you to solve the problem themselves.

chuckr · 09-01-2017, 03:15

I wish I could help fellow sailors out but I am just not smart enough and very limited skills but if I could I will - now does the black wire go to the plus or minus - I forget - maybe it is all that grey hair I have

old frog · 09-01-2017, 05:40

The older I get, the more I understand that good deeds get punished.

I have have assisted boaters only to similar treatment as the OP. Perhaps was the most insulting was assisting a young couple, towing them in, letting them borrow dry towels & cloths, providing a ride to their car & letting them keep their boat at my dock for a few days. They returned a few days later, did not return the towels & clothing, departed with their boat and left trash on the dock.

I still assist people, but am very careful not to let their problems become mine.

It is understood that within the US, the subjects of Good Samaritan protection laws and assumption of liability laws are complex.