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resilientg · 02-09-2012, 23:40

It started out a pleasant day, me happily being the proud owner of a small steel sailing boat.

happily sitting in the desolate field that i currently call home whilst i work on my pride and joy.

I decided to do some varnishing to complete my newly assembled teak and silky oak strip plank floor.

I smiled. but i smiled to soon.

My first record was set when i started the last coats of varnish on my floor.

I truly believe that i lost the most amount of hair from one single paint brush that a man could have possibly done ever in recorded history.

yes i could have gone all out and given my paint brush a Brazilian just to remove the last few strands of remaining hairs (if you could call what was left hair), but i was bloody nearly close enough to that just by painting. arrggghhhh

At one point i had that many hairs scattered on me, on the line that was hanging some parts of the floor, on the fence and on the surrounding area that if i just threw in some chicken bones i could have made a new cat

Bunnings hardware should be commended and the sourcing rep should be pleased, as they have found themselves the absolutely most cheapest and crappiest brush that has ever been assembled and disguised it in a package (probably to keep the fly's from swarming on the piece of sh!t).

My second record was actually quite easy to do and proved to be a pleasing record to set.

It was the farthest free flying throw of a paint brush that a man could do, it sailed high and far, it hit some wind currents and soared, if i was a Trojan i could have killed a running deer with the speed and accuracy of that evil flying brush.

The day ended slowly, me covered in hair, and a pair of hairy palms that made it look like i had taken up a new hobby, i pondered Micheal Angelo and the Cisteen chapel, i wondered slowly as i drank one of my home brew beers, how many brushes did he go through.