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etihwdj · 21-11-2010, 08:48

As retirement draws closer, my dream is to sell the home, cars, etc. and get a 40-50 ft. sailboat to live on. Though I have some experience with smaller boats, the plan would be to learn proper sailing of the yacht while using it primarily as a home until I've learned enough to actually begin cruising along the coast and ICW vs. short day jaunts. My wife is not yet enthusiastic about the idea. She has kindly agreed to experiement with the lifestyle, living aboard a "rental" for a month or two to get a feel for the experience. Unfortunately, I'm having difficulty finding available yachts for that type of rental period without an expense that would be better used as part of an actual purchase. Does anyone know of any resources to find this kind of opportunity? I appreciate any ideas, suggestions, etc.

LauderBoy · 21-11-2010, 09:05

Why not charter a larger boat for a week somewhere where you plan on ending up? Rather than living on a boat at a marina for a couple months, give your wife a taste of the best of the cruising lifestyle: a couple weeks sailing in beautiful waters.

If she gets bit by that bug the small little issues you have living in a marina just don't matter. But if that's a "not bad" experience for her, she'll probably be happier on land.

gettinthere · 21-11-2010, 09:21

Renting a boat tied to the dock won't give you a real feel for what cruising would be like. Two different animals.
But without some experience, you will be hard pressed to charter a large boat.

We discussed switching from power to sail for our livaboard life. My wife wasn't sure she would be comfortable sailing. So we did a crewed charter for a week. We made sure the charter captain would let us sail the boat a lot to get a feel for what it took. I made sure my wife did some winch grinding as well as some time at the wheel. She was a bit unsure, but liked it. We agreed to dive in after that charter and bought a 42' sailboat. Working out great so far. It ain't brain surgery.

Crewed charters are not all that expensive, especially if you choose closer to home to minimize travel costs. You could do a one week right now and then another one week in a few months to try it again...

etihwdj · 21-11-2010, 12:19

Thank you - this looks like a good plan, and I'll definitely check into it.

wetsail1 · 02-12-2010, 08:13

Just do it and don't look back cut all land ties

Capt. Chris · 02-12-2010, 09:14

My Wife supports my sailing and our boat~ but because of storms and stupidity on my part will only fly or meet me at a destination. It takes a special gal or guy-significant other, to enjoy the dream and accept the ups and downs of sailing life. Check out the web site of Lyn and larry pardey . they are in there golden days ,still cruising and have many books and publications on the life. Introduce you sweetie to the life but remember she needs to be a mate and some one who can sail and handle the boat as well as you not just a galley slave, if not by a wind-vane and Autopilot and enjoy single-handing like me.,Good sailing mate.~

zeehag · 07-12-2010, 01:21

Quote:

Originally Posted by Capt. Chris

My Wife supports my sailing and our boat~ but because of storms and stupidity on my part will only fly or meet me at a destination. It takes a special gal or guy-significant other, to enjoy the dream and accept the ups and downs of sailing life. Check out the web site of Lyn and larry pardey . they are in there golden days ,still cruising and have many books and publications on the life. Introduce you sweetie to the life but remember she needs to be a mate and some one who can sail and handle the boat as well as you not just a galley slave, if not by a wind-vane and Autopilot and enjoy single-handing like me.,Good sailing mate.~

i have found it takes a special kinda guy to be able to sail a female's boat and not turn into a peacock without brains. or a bligh. rofl. not every man is capable of being a sail partner yet they all want the female to conform to their ways. what if the female is a better sailor than the male??
each member of a team has his/her own jobs to do and has participation in a team atmosphere. sailing life is a gas. there are many females owning their own boats, but i see these females are ALL without teammates/crewmates. i see most men as all talk and no walk-- they can be all kinds of great to sail with on board their sailboats, but once in the female's boat they turn exceptionally weird. testosterone takes over or some thing....i hope there are some more guys out there who are more adaptable.......

Ray Perry · 07-12-2010, 03:04

I have been living on board a boat of some kind since 1972 (give or take a few years raising a couple of bilge rats (beautiful children). I feel very privileged to have experienced this great lifestyle. Bite the bullet and go for broke as the experiences and fantastic friends you will meet will keep you in great memories for the rest of your life. The bad sailing and anchorage experiences will be non existent if you become a safe mariner (never commit to a time frame).

**GordMay** · 07-12-2010, 06:02

Quote:

Originally Posted by zeehag

... there are many females owning their own boats, but i see these females are ALL without teammates/crewmates. i see most men as all talk and no walk ...

It may be that some female boat owners may be singlehanding partly because of how they view men.
Or not.

**Hudson Force** · 07-12-2010, 13:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by zeehag

.........each member of a team has his/her own jobs to do and has participation in a team atmosphere..........

When I see that the OP was stating that his wife was not yet enthusiastic about sailing, but willing to experiment; Zeehag's observations take on great importance. Likely, those couples that solve problems in a "team atmoshpere" ashore will do the same on the boat. As a cruising couple, we have evolved roles that we share and others have become the domain of one. My wife almost always brings our boat to a dock while I "cowboy" the lines and pilings and she does this better than I with her almost forty years of experience; however, if it's backing into a slip that's needed we shift places, as I somehow do that better. By some sense that I can not percieve, she can smell hot wiring or feel/hear?...the tiniest bit of line wrapped on our prop shaft. I'm the one that has the skill to dive for it...and there it is! Even if just a lace of fishing line at the zinc. Some things we share equally,---watches, taking the helm, trimming sails, navigation choices---and others are more one's domain. I can't help but think that those partnerships that function well ashore would do well at sea.

Mike43 · 07-12-2010, 13:58

When i am sailing I am gender neutral. In my experience there are two sports where women compete on an equal footing with men. The other is equestrian.
IMHO

**Hudson Force** · 08-12-2010, 13:54

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike43

When i am sailing I am gender neutral. In my experience there are two sports where women compete on an equal footing with men. The other is equestrian.
IMHO

.....and archery, skating, skeet shooting, fencing, darts, skiing, and tennis according to Billie Jean King, but Bobby Riggs was not the best male competition!

sailorboy1 · 08-12-2010, 14:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by GordMay

It may be that some female boat owners may be singlehanding partly because of how they view men.
Or not.

I have new respect for such a brave man

zeehag · 08-12-2010, 18:37

rofl.
i enjoyed a team sailing adventure last year-- this year i learned my sailing partner of that trip is suffering a paralytic problem resulting from a disc injury in his back. i therefore havent a crew nor partner in sailing.is much more difficult to find a partner for sailing than it is to find a partner for sex. go figger--isnt the way women see men--is the way men react to a female owning a 41 ft ketch. i have always enjoyed the company of men as friends. my brothers and i used to pull the legs off daddy long legs spideys together and laughed over all kinds of things--i am more comfortable palling and sailing with men than with women.

cpt force is correct--can only work as a team--

gord is ok.