The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[tkeithlu]

OK. Now one for you Canadian proventials:

A young man from Newfoundland moves to Toronto. After a year he writes to his parents. In his letter he says, "Hi mom and dad. I know it's been a while but so much has happened since I moved to Toronto. I got my own apartment, a pretty decent job and I met a wonderful woman whom I plan to marry. I'm living and eating well and I've grown another foot.

Three months go by and he gets a package back from his mother with a letter saying how "proud she and his father are of their boy and the success he's been having."

In the package he found three socks.

[jeanathon]

A redneck goes into the army, but only a few weeks later he is back home. His parents ask him why he went awol.

He says well my first week in the army they gave me a comb, but then cut off all my hair. The second week they gave me a toothbrush, but then pulled out most of my teeth.
The third week they gave me a jock strap.

[SailRN]

I've started a new diet, The Whiskey Diet.

I've lost three days already!


.

[Uncle Bob]

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1644525843

[chrisr]

cheers,

[Jim Cate]

Originally Posted by chrisr

Attachment 252763





cheers,

Thank god I'm married to a gal w ho would HOPE that the Valentine gift came from a chandlery!

Jim

[chrisr]

Originally Posted by Jim Cate

Thank god I'm married to a gal who would HOPE that the Valentine gift came from a chandlery!

Jim

yep...i've just brought debbie a new outboard as a valentine gift...

cheers,

[JPA Cate]

If it's easier for her to start, hey, that's you quicker to the ER! Good deal both ways.

Ann

[GordMay]

[carstenb]

Originally Posted by JPA Cate

If it's easier for her to start, hey, that's you quicker to the ER! Good deal both ways.

Ann

When we go into a chandlery, Vinni spends her time looking through screws, bolts and assorted do-dads. She rarely looks at clothes

go ahead- ask me if I'm a lucky guy

[Montanan]

Kind of like my wife and I:

A few years back I asked her what she might like for Valentine's Day: She said a twelve-inch compound miter saw. And I told her I wuld like a new splitting mall for preparing our firewood. We love practical gifts.

Albeit she topped me about five years ago, she bought me a new sailboat. A Hobie Tandem Island Adventure for our use in trailering to remote alpine lakes in Montana. Great fun small craft to complement our two larger sailboats.

[Eigenvector]

I know it’s late notice, but a friend of mine has two tickets to the Super Bowl in Inglewood, CA at SoFi Stadium Sunday February 13th. They are box seats and he paid $3500 per ticket, which includes the ride to and from the airport, lunch, dinner, a $400 bar tab and a pass to the winner’s locker room after the game. What he didn’t realize was that it’s on the same day as his wedding.
If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place. It’s at St. Paul’s Church at 3 pm. Her name is Ashley. She is 5’4”, about 100 pounds, a good cook, loves to play golf and will clean your truck. She’ll be the one in the white dress.

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Eigenvector

Her name is Ashley. She is 5’4”, about 100 pounds, a good cook, loves to play golf and will clean your truck. She’ll be the one in the white dress.

But does she own a boat, and will she clean fish?

[Uncle Bob]

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1644625367

[MicHughV]

my wife can work on diesel engines.....she is a tiny lass.... can crawl all over that engine with room to spare...will tackle most any grungy job, and doesn't mind grease under her fingernails.....but won't clean fish.......not ever....