The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[SailRN]

Originally Posted by ChrisJHC

No, no, no, not again!

I guess that was a bit mean of me to post that.

I apologize!

[jeanathon]

Can't access page 143 of this thread. Have tried view first unread, clicking on 143, go to last page, but it always takes me to page 142.
Trying to access it by replying, but if not the mods will see this post.

[SailRN]

Originally Posted by jeanathon

Seems the last joke thread was closed because of bickering and too many complaints to the moderators. So this time around let's not push our own political agendas. If someone repeatedly posts something you don't like let's use that ignore button people! Before the ignore button I used to get mad at some peoples' posts. Now I laugh when I see the message, "You cannot see this post because "whoever's on your s*** list is on ignore."

I live in N.C. and have not been able to go to work for the last two days because gas stations were out of gas, not because of lack of supply. Rather because of some special people out there. Feel Free to ad a caption.

From page 143.

[SailRN]

Originally Posted by jeanathon

Can't access page 143 of this thread. Have tried view first unread, clicking on 143, go to last page, but it always takes me to page 142.
Trying to access it by replying, but if not the mods will see this post.

It worked for me. The 1st post was yours.

[Montanan]

During winter and have to return to Montana be like:

[Montanan]

Hey, I resemble that remark.

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Montanan

During winter and have to return to Montana be like:

I thought that was dating down under

[delmarrey]

Originally Posted by Montanan

During winter and have to return to Montana be like:

I once had a trophy wife………..

But apparently she wasn’t first place.

[SailRN]

Originally Posted by delmarrey

I once had a trophy wife………..

But apparently she wasn’t first place.

Was it a consolation prize for participating?

[delmarrey]

Originally Posted by SailRN

Was it a consolation prize for participating?

No. It was a second place award. The beauty contest was great but the speech turned out to be undesirable and misleading.

[StuM]

Originally Posted by jeanathon

Can't access page 143 of this thread. Have tried view first unread, clicking on 143, go to last page, but it always takes me to page 142.
Trying to access it by replying, but if not the mods will see this post.

Just sayin':
Quoting page numbers is a bit pointless

[StuM]

f'rinstance:

[Montanan]

Name a boat.

[Montanan]

A wise monkey once said:

[OutOfControl]

An atheist was taking a walk through the woods. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals,” he said to himself. As he continued walking alongside the river he heard a rustling in the bushes. Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot Bear charging towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear raising his paw to take a swipe at him. At that instant the atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"

Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent.

It was then that a bright light shone upon the man and a voice from heaven asked, "You deny my existence for all of these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer?"

The atheist looked directly into the light. "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?"

“Very well,” said the Voice. The light went out, and the sounds of the forest resumed.

And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and for which I am truly thankful, Amen."