The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[Montanan]

In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. “Will I die?” she asks. God says, “No. You have 30 more years to live.” With 30 years to look forward to, she decides to make the best of it. So since she’s in the hospital, she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen injections in her lips. She looks great! The day she’s discharged, she exits the hospital with a swagger, crosses the street, and is immediately hit by an ambulance and killed. Up in heaven, she sees God. “You said I had 30 more years to live,” she complains. “That’s true,” says God. “So what happened?” she asks. God shrugs. “I didn’t recognize you.”

[Montanan]

A ventriloquist is performing with his dummy on his lap. He’s telling a dumb-blonde joke when a young platinum-haired beauty jumps to her feet. “What gives you the right to stereotype blondes that way?” she demands. “What does hair color have to do with my worth as a human being?” Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to stammer out an apology. “You keep out of this!” she yells. “I’m talking to that little jerk on your knee!”

[Montanan]

A man, shocked by how his buddy is dressed, asks him, “How long have you been wearing that bra?” The friend replies, “Ever since my wife found it in the glove compartment.”

[Uncle Bob]

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1669424311

[Uncle Bob]

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1669424367

[VWKDF]

I just heard the Turkish government is donating tanks to the Ukraine. You got to love that country, but then doesn't everyone love tanks giving Turkey.

[Montanan]

[skipperpete]

[ATTACH]268021

[JPA Cate]

Ah, yes, lovely dark meat, but think of all the folks who bought "Buffe"s, who got none!

[carstenb]

There are three kinds of people

1- Those that learn by reading
2- Those that learn by observation
3- Those that go pee on the electric fence and learn by experience


There are two theories about how to win an argument with a woman......
Neither one works

Only a fool or an idiot will try to win an argument with a woman....
I've been a foolish idiot a lot lately.


Good judgement is the result of vast experience
Vast experience is generally the result of bad judgement


The only thing that will stop hair loss is the floor


An honest politician is one that stays bought


all accredited to Will Rogers

[Uncle Bob]

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1669773219

[Uncle Bob]

Don't you just love christmas.

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1669874193

[Firemandivi]

[Uncle Bob]

[Uncle Bob]