The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[jeanathon]

Originally Posted by delmarrey

What is happening here………..

OWW!!! ****ing OWW!!!

[LakeSuperior]

..........

[senormechanico]

Just bought some condoms and the cashier asked if I needed a bag.


I said, "No, she's not that ugly."

[chris mac]

I just bought a box of condoms and the clerk said" that will be $9.95 plus tax"
Tacks I screamed.... Don't they stay on by themselves???

[VWKDF]

Originally Posted by StuM

Chair broke when he sat on it (naked) and they are trying to cut the seat away to free his nuts?

Get with the times, how dare you assume "his".

[Montanan]

Originally Posted by delmarrey

What is happening here………..

Wow!

Example of why one should not sit upon a slatted seat when you are naked and your balls can slip between the slats; especially if the slats are made of flexible material such that the gap will spread wide enough for the balls to slide through. Now that would be one very embarrassing situation and imagine being one of the EMT's arriving to have to resolve this by cutting the plastic slat away to free the man's balls.

They would go home and say: "You won't believe what happened at work today!"

[Bullshooter]

An old classic, sorry if you have heard it before:

A guy rings a horse dealer and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse. He tells the dealer his friend is a little man with a speech impediment

So, the chap shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.

"A female horth, pleeth."

So he shows him a prized horse.

"Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth?"

The guy picks up the little man and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.

"Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth?"

So he picks the little man up again, and shows him the horse's ears.

"Nith earzth. can I see her mouf?"

The rancher is getting pretty pisssed off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.

"Nice mouf, can I see her twaat?"

Totally pisssed off now the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams his head as far as he can up the horse's twaat, pulls him out and places him on the ground.

The chap gets up, sputtering and coughing and says

"Perhapth I should rephrathe that. Can I thee her wun awound a widdle bit?"

[Montanan]

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Montanan

Wow!

Example of why one should not sit upon a slatted seat when you are naked and your balls can slip between the slats; especially if the slats are made of flexible material such that the gap will spread wide enough for the balls to slide through. Now that would be one very embarrassing situation and imagine being one of the EMT's arriving to have to resolve this by cutting the plastic slat away to free the man's balls.

They would go home and say: "You won't believe what happened at work today!"

I wonder if they tried penetrating oil - usually the first step in freeing stuck nuts.

[chrisr]

Originally Posted by Lodesman

I wonder if they tried penetrating oil - usually the first step in freeing stuck nuts.

a bit of heat is also known to work well...

cheers,

[goguygo]

Igor had regrets about his decision to have a vasectomy the old fashioned way.

[BlueH2Obound]

Originally Posted by chrisr

a bit of heat is also known to work well...

cheers,

Yup, alternating application of a blow torch, or propane torch, then ice, or cooling spray, those nuts will back right off. Of course when the subject in question saw you lighting the torch, I suspect that the subject, and the problem would be quickly relocating to another place!

[mlydon]

If you absolutely can’t get them loose , as the very last resort….

[Firemandivi]

[AKA-None]

Originally Posted by Firemandivi

I said mons not mounds