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Star Fire · 23-02-2024, 09:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dsanduril

I learned it this way:

Why Fire Engines Are Painted Red

There are four men and eight wheels on a fire engine
Four and eight are twelve
There are twelve inches in a ruler
A ruler is Queen Elizabeth
Queen Elizabeth was a ship that sailed the seven seas
In the seas there are fish
The fish have fins
The Finns fought the Russians
The Russians are called “Reds”
Fire engines are always rushin’, that’s why they’re painted red.

If you’re in a house with no windows, no doors, and a mirror and a table, how do you get out?

You look in the mirror and see what you saw.
Take the saw and cut the table in half.
Two haves make a whole.
And you climb out through the hole.

**GordMay** · 24-02-2024, 05:44

Whomever said, "laughter is the best medicine":
Clearly, hasn't tried curing diarrhea, with a tickle fight.
And, clearly, never suffered from erectile dysfunction.
Probably caused, so many of my contemporaries, to die, from tuberculosis.
Probably thought that, making fun of anti-vaxxers, should be considered a public service.

**GordMay** · 24-02-2024, 05:47

I told my doctor: "I'm sure I have liver disease".
"That's ridiculous" said my doctor. "You'd never know if you have liver disease, there's no discomfort of any kind".
"Exactly!" I say, "Those are my precise symptoms!"

My Doctor: "You have a disease, but we can treat it."
Me: "What’s the Cure?"
Doctor: "It’s an 80s rock band, fronted by Robert Smith, but let’s try to stay focussed."

People say, smoking will give you diseases.
What they don't say, is that it cures salmon.

Q: Which disease, hypochondriacs are sure, that they don't have?
A: Hypochondria.