The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[johnny AoB]

Why does New York have all the lawyers and New Jersey all of the toxic waste dumps?
.
.
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New Jersey got first choice.

[Uncle Bob]

Now back to boating reality

https://www.cruisersforum.com/forums...1&d=1629772536

[Oeanda]

A busload of politicians is touring the countryside, rallying the common people, drumming up votes and spreading the good word of ‘the new plan’, righteous democracy, family values, and ‘free stuff’.

But alas, one night the bus fails to show up at a scheduled town meeting. The common people are pissed, and they start grumbling. ‘ Where’s our free stuff? ‘

The sheriff promises he’ll look into it. Sends out the constabulary next day who aren’t out long before coming across the smashed up bus in a ditch next to Farmer Dick’s pasture, and wander over for a chat.

‘Hey Dick ya know anything about this here bus?’

‘Yar that there bus came around the corner back there too fast and crashed real bad right there near me field yesterday. Was chock fulla politicians’.

‘’Any idea where they are now then Dick ?’

‘Oh yar I buried all the buggers inna field right there ’

‘What?!!! They were all dead???’

‘Well summa them said they weren’t. But you know how the bastards lie’.

[GordMay]

[GordMay]

[Halifax Sailor]

Originally Posted by senormechanico

Wow. Just WOW.
A thread where everyone agrees !

Hell has just frozen over.

WOW, I can fix that.....................anchors.............led or regular lights...........gas or diesel??

[GordMay]

Q: What’s the difference between Covid-19, and Romeo and Juliet?
A: One’s the coronavirus, and the other is a Verona crisis!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because the chicken behind it didn’t know how to socially distance properly!

Q: Which Christmas film was 30 years ahead of its time?
A: “Home Alone”.

[GordMay]

The World Health Organisation announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released.
To be clear, "WHO let the dogs out”.

My mother always told me, I wouldn’t accomplish anything, by lying around the house all day.
But look at me now! I’m saving the world!

[Tom_F]

[SailRN]

Proof of global warming:

[SailRN]

Congress, the opposite of Progress...

[jeanathon]

If I was a member of Congress and was a crook,
but I repeat myself.
Mark Twain

[goguygo]

The Prime Minister, a Senator, a hippie and a priest were on a plane.

The pilot yelled out "She's gonna crash!!" frantically ran past the passengers, grabbed a parachute pack and jumped out.

Upon noticing there were three parachutes left, the Prime Minister stated he was one of the most important people in the world, grabbed a parachute and hopped out.
The Senator said he had some critical votes coming up- much more important than anything a hippy or the priest could have going on and they would would need to figure things out on their own. He rushed to the door, grabbed a pack and out he went.


"Son, I am at peace and ready to meet my Maker... please take the last parachute"


"Relax, Father... I see the Senator just jumped out of the plane with my backpack on!"

[Uncle Bob]

New age reality??

[Uncle Bob]