The 2021 -2024 and Continuing Joke Threads

[senormechanico]

Don't forget the lube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRozAbaKs9M

[GordMay]

[GordMay]

It has been proven that Greta Thunberg is making a real difference to climate change.
Every time she appears on TV, approximately 1 million people switch it off.

I don’t have a Carbon Footprint.
Because, I drive everywhere.

We all have to do our part for the environment. And there are many different ways one can save energy.
I normally use the couch.

[GordMay]

I think we can get conservatives on board with climate change initiatives, if we just focus on consequences that mean something to them.
I've read that polar ice is melting, causing polar bears to migrate south. They've actually started sharing habitat with grizzly bears, and are even interbreeding with them.

Now if there's one thing conservatives hate, more than science, it's interracial marriage.
So, all we need to do, is let them know that global warming is causing proud white bears to hook up with little brown ones, and they should come right around.

[GordMay]

Q: What do you think our most powerful renewable resource is?
A: DENIAL.

Q: How do you solve climate change?
A1: Convince conservatives that rising temperatures are turning people gay.
A2: Blame it on the poor.

I bought some sheets, but they kept telling me climate change wasn't real.
I should have checked the Denier rating.

[GordMay]

I encountered a time traveler, from the year 2045, today.
During my self isolation, he came to the door, dressed in a hazmat suit.
I was, of course, alarmed, when I opened the door to such a site.
He quickly explained who he was, and asked if he could have just a few minutes of my time.
I didn't believe anything he was saying, but I figured the risk of transmission was low, due to his protective gear, and frankly, I was ready for some human interaction, even from a potential crazy person, so I let him in.

He sat down and said he wanted to tell me some things about the future because if this knowledge was entrusted to me, I could be trusted to use it for good. Over the next few minutes he told me about many things but I was left with many questions. He said I could ask a few, so I did.

I asked about climate change. He assured me that after 2035, nations got serious and the problem has been all but solved.

I asked about Covid-19. He assured me it would be a blip on the radar of human history and nobody worries about pandemics anymore.

I asked about massive economic turmoil we are in. He said despite the borrowing and deficits of earlier times, those debts are now repaid. The United States has never been a better more united society. Everyone has free healthcare.

I was so happy to hear all this. I asked about inflation and how much it costs for a gallon of water, or a loaf of bread or a cup of coffee.

He chuckled and said I didn't need to worry about such trivial things.
In the year 2045, it was possible to still get coffee, at Starbucks, in America, for under 350 Yuan.

[carlosproa]

Humor is an exaggeration of what could be. Some of it is local and cultural and some are universal. Those who tell jokes take daily risks to alienate; but it is a risk worth taken, as life without humor is quite depressing

[Pelagic]

I was reading Gord's environment jokes on my Smart phone while Smart View also had it on the TV.

Perfect display of Stereotypes!

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Buzzman

COP26 is not going to be fun for anyone, especially those most committed to getting the myopic to see straight.

With 20/20 vision, I still don't see how 40,000 people jetting off to a massive bash in Scotland, is supposed to convince us unenlightened peons that things like air travel are rapidly bringing on climate calamity.

[sv_pelagia]

Adrian Raeside cartoon: Who is writing all that garbage on social media?

https://www.timescolonist.com/opinio...dia-1.24364666

[senormechanico]

What happened to the Joke Thread?

[Adelie]

The original joke thread was closed 4-5yr ago.
The New joke thread was closed early this year.
The Newer New joke thread was renamed the 2021 joke thread since we didn’t want to have a Newer, newer new joke thread whenever this one gets closed.

[Joh.Ghurt]

Originally Posted by Adelie

The original joke thread was closed 4-5yr ago.
The New joke thread was closed early this year.
The Newer New joke thread was renamed the 2021 joke thread since we didn’t want to have a Newer, newer new joke thread whenever this one gets closed.

The naming of the Joke Thread became a joke.

[Tayana42]

Ogden would be Gnashing his teeth over these attempts at humor.

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by Adelie

The original joke thread was closed 4-5yr ago.
The New joke thread was closed early this year.
The Newer New joke thread was renamed the 2021 joke thread since we didn’t want to have a Newer, newer new joke thread whenever this one gets closed.

This one has been struggling, perhaps you can rename it again...
... The Joker Valve...