The New Joke Thread

[LakeSuperior]

Boat rental manager over loudspeaker: boat number 81, your two hour rental period is up, please return to the dock.

Boat rental intern to manager: uh, sir, we only have 60 boats.

Boat rental manager over loudspeaker: boat number 18, do you require assistance?

[LakeSuperior]

An old couple in their 90s files for divorce. The judge wants to know why they're divorcing after a lifetime together. They say, "Well, your honor, we were waiting for the children to die."

[LakeSuperior]

A man asked a quantum physicist what his opinion on quantum superposition was.

He replied, "Ah well, I'm neither here nor there."

[Eigenvector]

Filming a new movie in Houston.

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by Montanan

The primary difficulty with political jokes is that all too often they get elected.

We noticed..
Opps.!!!
Going up..???

[Adelie]

Originally Posted by Eigenvector

Filming a new movie in Houston.

What’s worse, doing that to a $10k car or doing this to a $130k SUV?

[Mirage35]

Originally Posted by LakeSuperior

In a freak accident today, a photographer was killed when a huge lump of cheddar landed on him

To be fair though, the people who were being photographed did try to warn him.

Oooh - that one took me a minute. Off to get another coffee.

[Mickeyrouse]

Originally Posted by socaldmax

Let's see...

Almost as much as she can spend.

[Mickeyrouse]

Originally Posted by Eigenvector

Filming a new movie in Houston.

Only in Texas. And I should know.

[MicHughV]

must be an English player

[double u]

Originally Posted by AnglaisInHull

Oooh - that one took me a minute. Off to get another coffee.

please elucidate for the non-native speaker...

[BlueH2Obound]

Originally Posted by double u

please elucidate for the non-native speaker...

CHEESE!!!!

[skipmac]

*****

[Adelie]

Originally Posted by double u

please elucidate for the non-native speaker...

There is a trope that photographers ask subjects to say ‘Cheese’ when photographing them which results in an expression that looks like a smile.

The joke is that they were warning him of the big hunk of cheese about to strike him not saying ‘cheese’ for the photo.

[fxykty]

Originally Posted by Adelie

There is a trope that photographers ask subjects to say ‘Cheese’ when photographing them which results in an expression that looks like a smile.



The joke is that they were warning him of the big hunk of cheese about to strike him not saying ‘cheese’ for the photo.

Thank you on behalf of non-English speakers (writers? readers?) for explaining clearly.

Thank you as well for demonstrating how a joke loses all its charm and humour when it is explained.