A writer's question

[Mike Banks]

The trip got off to a bad start at the jetty when David yelled "Maxine--grasp that painter"

And she promptly hugged the guy at the next berth who was busily retouching his brightwork--

[Celestialsailor]

I yelled once at my former wife...does that tell you anything?
I asked her to keep the nose of the boat in the wind. She would not pay attention and would go wildly off course. I yelled.."Starboard starboard!!! She would put the tiller hard over one way then the other. the boom almost knocking me off the boat. I yelled again..."Your other starboard you $%^& !!!

[Ex-Calif]

Seeing as it's a play, it might be appropriate to create a dialog.

Reid: "These are freakin' bean sprouts you idiot. I told you on Thursdays I want Alfalfa Sprouts! I can't believe I have another 725 days on this tub with you."

Soanya: "Ooh. Look at the pretty rainbow. Do you think the dolphins name the individual raindrops? They are so distinct in thier size and their shape and even their smell. Living on a boat is fantastic, Reid. Do you think we will catch any fish this month?"

Reid: "Aaaaarrrgh! What a moron. Leave me now. I have to splice twine and eat some cheese."

[Lorianne Davies]

Just wanted to say that I am in tears from laughing so hard at some of the replies to Christina's playwriting dilemm. Keep up the good work!
Lorianne

[Lorianne Davies]

Sorry, meant Carolina"s playwriting dilemma.

[MarkJ]

Originally Posted by Ex-Calif

Seeing as it's a play, it might be appropriate to create a dialog.

Reid stumps off forrad to the mast and climbs nimbly to the Crows Nest. Well, as nimbly as one can with a peg leg, hook, parrot and only one eye. He sits and delicately splices his twine as he spits bits of cheese and sprouts over the audience.

Below, Soanya rushes to the aft cabin and throws herself on the bed. Above her we see large windows opening onto jumping dolphins, a sandy island with coconut palms, and vague outlines of skyscrapers from last years production of Chicago.

She reaches under the lashed down pillow and draws out a photo and clasps it to her heaving bosom: “Oh Cedric. How my heaving has stopped but my bosom has not. Our diabolical plan is unfolding and our true love for each other will be reunited soon.
Oh! I think I feel a song coming on!"
Reid (above) Clicks his heals
As Soanya starts to sing:
“My Heart is Hove To for You”
As Reid in the Crows Nest dances the Jolly Tar Twine Dance as other sailors appear in the rigging dancing.

[Charlie]

When he told her to release the sheet but she blew the halyard. The mans'l (mainsail) ended up in a pile on the dick. Oh I mean deck. Well I guess they are both accurate. After what he said to her . . . It was no surprise she didn't want to get between the sheets with him.

[Benny]

Since your play will most probably be viewed by lubbers (nonsailors) it is best to use a couple of nautical terms that most of them would have heard before and would get the reason for the skippers' yelling although still identifying with his girfriend who is inexperienced. So in this vien you might try:

He yelled "I said cast off the bow line - not the stern!" Bow being the pointy end and stern the blunt end of the boat. or

"Now look what you've done - I said steer to starboard - to the right - not port which is left. Now you've put a big scape in the paint!" yelled as they were attempting to leave the dock.

Good luck,

Randy Benoit

[Ex-Calif]

Originally Posted by Charlie

When he told her to release the sheet but she blew the halyard. The mans'l (mainsail) ended up in a pile on the dick. Oh I mean deck. Well I guess they are both accurate. After what he said to her . . . It was no surprise she didn't want to get between the sheets with him.

How about she gets mad at him...

Reid: "Soanya, I told you we need to tighten up the sheets, dammit. Hop to it."

Soanya: "Look mate, this ain't the damn marine corps. At this pay rate you can make your own freakin' beds if you want the sheets tighter."

[Lydia]

David and Maxine pull into a beautiful cove to anchor for a quicky. David yells at Maxine to drop the hook. In her excited state and boating inexperience, she drops the anchor without it being connected to the boat. That definately deflated the mood shall we say.

[Buddy_Y]

As a career writer (and writer instructor), I can't help offering my smart-ass idea even though I'm sure Carolina already has what she needs. Nevertheless....

When I started boating waaaay back in the day (last July), I inherited a temporary anchor light with my boat -- for Carolina, that's a small cylindrical light that you can raise up on the mast at night when at anchor, so that other boats can see you. However, being a half-informed newbie (the most dangerous creature the seas have ever known) I briefly thought the anchor light was an E.P.I.R.B., which is an "Emergency Position Indicating Radio Beacon" -- a distress radio for use only when your boat sinks, and which will bring the Coast Guard on the run.

I've often imagined what would happen to a newbie who made the reverse mistake: Imagine a person who mistook an EPIRB for an anchor light, activated it one night, raised it on their mast, and tucked into their bunk for a peaceful night sleep....